In a world where striving and improvement are often the order of the day, when positive thinking is the antidote for trouble you’re up against, there comes a moment to stop all of it, to be extra-tender with ourselves.
Maybe our wings are tired and we need a rest.
Maybe we need compassion.
The song “She Used To Be Mine” is full of compassion. It’s from the musical, “Waitress,” playing currently on Broadway at Brooks Atkinson Theatre.
This piece by Sara Bareilles (who wrote the score for the musical, “Waitress”) is a moment of slowing down, of confessing, of looking honestly at the state of things. She tells us how her world has unfolded, about what has happened vs. what she had hoped for, about her dreams, about where life stands.
Because of its tenderness, I submit this song as salve, as comfort for whatever you, or someone you know, might be facing. Sarah’s song is shelter for her own heart, but also for anyone who has experienced any part of her story.
In the words of Sara Bareilles, “She is all of this, mixed up and baked in a beautiful pie…”
Today, I’m sharing a story about how I accidentally accomplished something on my bucket list. I ran through an exit gate while looking the other way. The hood of my car is scratched up, and one windshield wiper is a mess, but let’s have a good laugh about how we never expect what “getting what we want” includes!
It seems to be a growing fad these days to call someone a narcissist, or declare they are toxic.
Political name-calling is similar—we assign politicians and voters to categories, and brush them off as if they are unintelligent, inferior, or even worthless.
By labeling others, we miss their humanity. We gloss over their struggle, their best effort at dealing with life. We dismiss them.
We do to them what we believe they are doing to others.
Look past a label, and in the soft light of day, there stands a person like you or like me, coping as best they can. At the end of the day, no friend, parent, or lover making conscious choices intends to be mean, or to ignore, or to embellish. There is always more to the story.
If we label others, then for sure we label ourselves. We trap ourselves into believing we are less than. Or not enough. Or we don’t give ourselves the time and forgiveness to work through our “stuff.” Maybe, if we stopped accusing others of narcissism, we could forgive ourselves for those moments when we were narrow-minded, inconsiderate, or afraid.
When it comes to labels, nobody wins.
So, my dear people, I suggest we peer a little deeper into ourselves to investigate a need to separate ourselves from others by tacking them with a label filled with disdain or scorn.
It is my wish that you view this video and take it to heart.