If you know me at all, you know I’m happy to share helpful information, or a valuable resource about anything, especially about the subject of relationships. I love passing information to you that is useful in a daily way or a lifetime kind of way, no matter where it comes from
I love sharing what works.
Also, if you know me, you’re aware that I’m a very big fan of Abraham-Hicks material. I’ve listened to hours and hours of their work over the last 10 years or so. Their material has been beyond valuable to me personally. And every once in a while, even after all this time, I hear something that totally blows me away. which happened (yet again!) this morning. I was blown away.
There I was doing yoga on the mat. Thinking it would be fun to listen to a YouTube recording while I stretched, I reached over to my phone and found one. I pushed PLAY as I did my first down dog.
But you know what? The Abraham conversation I heard was so perfectly unfolding, so masterful, so helpful to anyone in a partnership, that I did a few minutes of yoga and then without thinking, found myself spontaneously, naturally, completely still as I listened to this amazing exchange. Here’s how it starts.
HE: I want to know how to stay positive and have a happy marriage when the other partner is really negative.
(gentle laughter from the crowd, in recognition of his situation)
HE: (continues) I meditate, I’ll be in a happy mood, and man! Bam! She hits me with this stuff, and she always wants to talk about the negative. And I’ll tell her, hey I don’t want to talk about the negative, I want to talk about the positive. It’s been a real struggle, especially since we have a 2 month old baby. And it’s real hard on me. I’m practicing, I’m trying, and it works in a lot of areas in my life, but this one is the hardest.
So Abraham begins very gently with a talk about compassion, saying that compassion isn’t quite like sympathy or empathy. Instead, according to Abraham, compassion is being in a receptive mode and focused on someone, so that your viewpoint is including the viewpoint of your Source.
What an amazing definition of compassion.
So what this young man is given, in 17 minutes and 13 seconds is a very poignant lesson about what to do about talking to his negative wife. I’m going to keep today’s blog really short so you can spend a little time listening to this totally brilliant conversation.And if you’d like to join me for an outstanding online relationship event, go toLOVE THE ONE YOU’RE WITH.If you like the Abraham recording, you’ll like this event. I guarantee it.
What a good idea, don’t you think, to LOVE THE ONE YOU’RE WITH, whether we’re talking about loving you or someone else? And since there’s a strong connection between how much you love and accept yourself and how happy you are in a relationship, you could say that everything really starts with loving you.
I’m excited about my upcoming course for women starting in April, called LOVE THE ONE YOU’RE WITH. This course is the cream layer of what I’ve learned in 40 years about relationships. Over 7 weeks, course participants will learn 6 pivotal changes that offer beneficial and immediately applicable shifts in perspective right where you want them, along with valuable and life-enhancing tools for improving your relationship.
If I had known even two of the six pivotal changes and put them into practice, it would have changed the direction of my life entirely.
If someone had told me when I was about 20 years old that I was working perfectly, that there was nothing wrong with me, and nothing to fix, I am sure I would have looked at them quite quizzically. Maybe I would have asked for some evidence.
And if I had asked for evidence, maybe they would have told me the proof that everything about me is working perfectly is that there is something I’m really good at. (And everyone else in the world is good at this, as well.)
They would have sat me down and told me that I was really good at producing the results I produce. I’m a master of my own outcomes. The only question is, “Do I like those outcomes? Am I producing the results I want?”
They might have told me that there’s a big secret the adults who raised us probably didn’t teach us, or operate from. If they didn’t teach us, it simply means they forgot the secret themselves. They didn’t teach it to us because they couldn’t.
Most parents didn’t tell us that we have within us a built-in, surefire way of determining what’s on track for us and what’s not. What’s right for us, what’s not so much. What brings out our talents and inner knowing, and what doesn’t. What makes us shiny happy, bursting with enthusiasm, and ready to take on the world, vs. what makes us discouraged, reticent, or even mad-as-a-hornet-angry.
If they didn’t teach us, it’s because they forgot it themselves, even though I believe with all my heart that we come into this life knowing fully how to make decisions beneficial to who we are and where we’re headed.
So the course will begin with remembering that everything about you is working perfectly. We’ll talk about the evidence for that, and make sure this idea is our “solid ground.” Then we’ll remember and revive our inner guidance system, which changes everything. That’s for starters.
After that, we’ll work with other questions over the seven weeks that we’re together. Here are a few.
What is one of the most deeply powerful influences on male-female relationships that almost everyone ignores?How could this set of information work to your advantage if you knew what it was and how it works?
What are three personal philosophies that help create a consistently positive flow in your relationship and in your life?
Why does change feel so strange at first?
What are five easy-to-remember steps to change?
What’s the connection between thought, feeling and outcome?How does knowing this help you change?
What moves your relationship from average to brilliant?What changes it from “going through the motions,” to more fun and satisfying?
I hope you’ll join me in answering those questions, and in doing so, creating positive momentum in your relationship. There are only eight seats available in this first course, but there will be more. If you’d like to find out more about this unique course, or if you’d like to participate, click over now.
Today, I’m sharing a story about how I accidentally accomplished something on my bucket list. I ran through an exit gate while looking the other way. The hood of my car is scratched up, and one windshield wiper is a mess, but let’s have a good laugh about how we never expect what “getting what we want” includes!
It seems to be a growing fad these days to call someone a narcissist, or declare they are toxic.
Political name-calling is similar—we assign politicians and voters to categories, and brush them off as if they are unintelligent, inferior, or even worthless.
By labeling others, we miss their humanity. We gloss over their struggle, their best effort at dealing with life. We dismiss them.
We do to them what we believe they are doing to others.
Look past a label, and in the soft light of day, there stands a person like you or like me, coping as best they can. At the end of the day, no friend, parent, or lover making conscious choices intends to be mean, or to ignore, or to embellish. There is always more to the story.
If we label others, then for sure we label ourselves. We trap ourselves into believing we are less than. Or not enough. Or we don’t give ourselves the time and forgiveness to work through our “stuff.” Maybe, if we stopped accusing others of narcissism, we could forgive ourselves for those moments when we were narrow-minded, inconsiderate, or afraid.
When it comes to labels, nobody wins.
So, my dear people, I suggest we peer a little deeper into ourselves to investigate a need to separate ourselves from others by tacking them with a label filled with disdain or scorn.
It is my wish that you view this video and take it to heart.