Posts Tagged ‘being yourself’

Today, A Small Story About Why Being Yourself Matters.

recycle-center

I often think about the people who make our daily world run.

Today, as I flattened my boxes and emptied my goods at the Henderson County Recycling Center, I thought about all the people who make this place work.

There was no one waiting to pull into my spot, so I took my sweet time, and looked around more than usual.

A big container for plastic and glass was missing. No problem, I thought. I’ll head down the row and find another one.

But wait! 

Shielding my eyes and staring into the distance I wondered if the driver of the big truck coming this way was bringing an empty container.

He was.

I found myself wondering how he would get that gigantic container to sit down right where it’s supposed to…

Hmm. Maybe I’ll watch.

Like something out of a cartoon, he sped over the landscape in his giant truck, kicking up a little dust as he drove, made a perfect turn, backed up efficiently, and put that behemoth of a container down in the empty space in the most precise way.

The container was lined up (I swear) within a half an inch of the other one. Amazed at his precision, I watched him slide that gigantic chunk of metal perfectly into place. I have to tell you, it was LOUD, and it was a thing of beauty.

I didn’t know he was watching me.

WAIT FOR IT

No question, I expected an extra loud crash when the other end of the container dropped to the ground — I totally, without a doubt knew it was coming.

But when it finally dropped, it was louder than I expected and it scared me to death. I jumped, screamed a little, and then laughed at myself and shook it off.

Within a few seconds, a handsome, burly, tan guy with hunky shoulders and arms, wearing sunglasses and a work vest appeared from below and chuckled, “Did I scare ya?”

We both laughed!

THE INVITATION

This man was a gentleman and I so entirely loved that he invited me to use the empty container he had just delivered. The direct and to the point way he spoke matched his ability to deliver containers.

HE: Do you have some cans and bottles?

ME:  I do.

HE:  (gesturing towards the container) Go right ahead.

ME: The doors are closed.

HE:  They slide open easily. Just give them a push to the right.

ME:  Well, how easy is that? Thank you!

He smiled, gave me a quick wave and went on his way. 

LOVE THAT VARIETY!

I love men of all types — burly garbage guys, proper professors, bold businessmen and everything in between. I love the young man at Verizon who helped me with my phone. He wore gray tennis shoes and tight jeans rolled up to reveal tall red socks, the perfect color of subtle red. Quite the creative outfit!

He knew everything, everything, everything about my phone.

If the Verizon wizard stood next to the guy who drives trucks and hauls heavy containers, you would have nodded with me at the marvelous variety of men in this world.

It’s like seeing a rose next to an orchid. Or a football player next to a gentle guy who’s really good at arranging flowers.

Both are beautiful, and they are entirely different from one another.

ONE KEY TO A GREAT RELATIONSHIP

One of the secrets to a great relationship, you know, is appreciating differences between you and your partner.

No need to change each other.

No need for a kerfuffle when your partner can’t do what you can do. After all, the truck driver in his fluorescent work vest and the phone wizard in rolled up pants and red socks both make the world work.

If you’re organized and your partner isn’t, or you’re a democrat and s/he’s republican, leave it alone.

Let there be variety in your togetherness. Bring your individual strengths to the relationship and you’ll have a whole lot of good fun.

Why?

Because then — everybody’s “all in.”

EVERYBODY’S ALL IN!

There’s nothing better FOR YOU or YOUR FAMILY than being ALL IN!

WHAT IS YOURS TO GIVE?

If you’re the relaxed, fun-loving one in the relationship who has the ability to kick back and lighten things up when your Henny Penny partner is sure the sky is falling, bring your calm and cool, fun-loving self to the relationship.

It’s your gift, but only if you give it.

If you’re good at keeping conversations on track, don’t be disgruntled at another in your family who wanders hopelessly through a discussion without a compass. Be the compass. They are doing their best — go ahead and do yours, and do it with deep kindness.

If you’re the money manager, the one accountable for the financial well-being of the family, do that, and stand still in your accountability.  Be that person entirely. Your partner may have no idea what accountability really is, so BE it. No need to make them like you, just be YOU.

If you’re good at listening, bring your lit up ears to your relationship. Contribute that. Be the person who is present and listens fully. Everybody benefits.

Don’t question yourself or hold back on expressing your skill because you’re the odd one out. Bring your gift, express it, contribute it.

Contributing your natural knowing makes your team a better team — you are bringing the real you to your daily expression (which feels satisfying to you) and those you care about get the very best of you!

 

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Rise Up by Andra Day

What a great set of words for these oncoming days.

Rise Up

 
You’re broken down and tired
Of living life on a merry go round
And you can’t find the fighter
But I see it in you so we gonna walk it out
And move mountains
We gonna walk it out
And move mountains
And I’ll rise up
I’ll rise like the day
I’ll rise up
I’ll rise unafraid
I’ll rise up
And I’ll do it a thousand times again
And I’ll rise up
High like the waves
I’ll rise up
In spite of the ache
I’ll rise up
And I’ll do it a thousand times again
For you
For you
For you
For you
When the silence isn’t quiet
And it feels like it’s getting hard to breathe
And I know you feel like dying
But I promise we’ll take the world to its feet
And move mountains
Bring it to its feet
And move mountains
And I’ll rise up
I’ll rise like the day
I’ll rise up
I’ll rise unafraid
I’ll rise up
And I’ll do it a thousand times again
For you
For you
For you
For you
All we need, all we need is hope
And for that we have each other
And for that we have each other
And we will rise
We will rise
We’ll rise, oh, oh
We’ll rise
I’ll rise up
Rise like the day
I’ll rise up
In spite of the ache
I will rise a thousand times again
And we’ll rise up
High like the waves
We’ll rise up
In spite of the ache
We’ll rise up
And we’ll do it a thousand times again
For you
For you
For you
For you
Ah, ah, ah, ah
Source: LyricFind
Songwriters: Cassandra Monique Batie / Jennifer Decilveo
Rise Up lyrics © BMG Rights Management

Terri’s book of photography combined with poetry is here! 100 Words: Small Servings of Whimsy and Wisdom to Calm the Mind and Nourish the Heart.

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Rippling Abs, Anyone?

Rippling Abs, Anyone?

During this strange time in history, I noticed y’all were tackling all sorts of interesting projects. I decided I needed one, too—something positive to remember the pandemic of 2020 by.
 
I decided to pay attention to something I had abandoned…
 
Nope, I’m not cleaning my garage. I am not organizing one single thing. I’m not planting a garden or cleaning up my yard.
 
Instead, I decided to take care of myself better. This, folks, has made all the difference for me.
 
With relatively little time and effort on my part, I feel so much better than I did a month ago.
 
On March 30, I got on the exercise bike and the yoga mat for the first time in a long time, and did 30 minutes each. I liked it so much that I decided to do it every day. But I fell short of that, and changed my commitment to every other day, which felt more manageable, reasonable, and doable.
 
I also get off the bike after every song, take a couple of sips of water, shake out my legs and arms for a few seconds, and get back on. This makes the bike project a reasonable proposition, too.
 
Daily walks of any length—by myself, or with my little guy, Jackson—are a fresh air bonus.
 
My recumbent exercise bike has pulleys to work my upper body while I pedal, which gets my heart rate up fast, and also helps my whole-body strength. It feels good to get up from writing, or doing a consulting session with a client, to do something physically challenging while listening to good music.
 
After only a month, I feel a sheet of muscles on the front of me I haven’t felt for a very, very long time. Goodness gracious. Who knew they were there. I’ll be posting rippling ab photos soon, I’m sure.
 
I have no idea what the scales have to say about my bike/yoga project—I don’t care. Paying attention to scales tends to send me sideways, and therefore, I’m ignoring them completely.
 
But—I LOVE the way I feel! Hang in there, everyone.
 

Terri’s book of photography combined with poetry is here! 100 Words: Small Servings of Whimsy and Wisdom to Calm the Mind and Nourish the Heart.

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Check Out This Troublemaker in Relationships

Check Out This Troublemaker in Relationships

Sometimes we ask intimate partners to do for us what is actually ours to do.

We ask our partner to give us the reassurance, love or appreciation we feel is missing in ourselves, with the hope that they will give us what we’re asking for—and then we’ll feel better. They’ll take care of our problem.

But when they do give us what we’re asking for, it can never be enough, because we have insufficient context for what they’ve given. We haven’t build the inner foundation to receive it, hear it, welcome it, believe it. They try to help, but their love for us falls into our void, our black hole, our love bucket with no bottom.

As always, there’s hope. Check out the video below.

Terri Crosby. http://www.incareofrelationships.com/.

Image by Free-Photos from Pixabay

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Terri Crosby

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