Need A New Mantra? Try This One.

explosion

Written by Terri Crosby for In Care of Relationships

I’ve got a new Mantra. And I’m willing to share! It happened accidentally. Didn’t even mean to do it. Here it is for your “trying on” pleasure:  I’M A NEW PERSON, EVERY SINGLE SECOND. This means — basically, essentially, at the core — that we adopt the point of view, “Why not leave my baggage from the past in the past.  What about now? What about this moment and what I’d really like to do, be or have going forward?” What I think I can’t do —  that I want to do?  This mantra encourages and high fives us to be done with singing songs of the past.  I mean what the heck!   How in the world does hauling “I can’t” or “I didn’t” from the past improve the quality of life? It doesn’t. It’s a whole lot more fun to sing songs of progress.

What Happened…jump

I’ve got to tell you what happened that just knocked me over and started me on this new mantra.  And the event itself is not even hugely important, as epic events go, but it did illustrate something pretty big for me. Funny how that works — a small personal event makes a huge impact. I’ve been a coffee drinker for my entire life.   I gotta have my java in the morning, first thing.  French Press, with a teensy bit of cream.  I don’t like much cream, just enough to suggest creaminess.  Then that beautiful dark roast comes through. So this past Monday morning, I woke up and didn’t want coffee.  It just didn’t sound good.  That surprised me.  It seemed so odd. “Wow,” I thought to myself.  “This is really, really weird. What if I get one of those headaches and have a miserable ouchy-in-the-head kind of day without my coffee?”  But I decided to take the risk.  And guess what? Nothing happened, except that I felt good. I didn’t miss coffee. Didn’t crave it. Didn’t need it. Didn’t drink it. Wow. Suspended BallYou just don’t know what that did to my head — to my reality about how certain things are naturally going to be difficult, based on past experience or understanding. You have to know that I was the kind of person who would drink coffee upon wakening.  Like right away, first thing, get out of bed, do not pass go, trudge to the kitchen in my pajamas, make coffee, drink the darn coffee, it’s hot, it’s substantial, it’s my unwavering tradition, a routine, a necessity —  give me my coffee!  Even if I was going out for breakfast, I would still have coffee before I left the house. I changed an age old habit, and didn’t even try.  I truly like the feeling of not needing coffee — that I have choices. This whole experience begs the question — what else could I change ever so effortlessly, just by taking the leap?  Maybe it’s time to be done with all of that seriously serious stuff about what we can and can’t do??!!??  Or how hard it will be to change? Timeblast off for a blastoff! That’s all I have to say this week!  That’s it in a nutshell! And how about you?  What has changed for you lately, and how did it happen?  Was it easy?  Surprising?  Fantastic? Do tell!

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For more information about In Care of Relationships, click here.

About Terri Crosby — I live in the Blue Ridge Mountains with Eric, my partner of 14 years, two cats and a dog, and as many flowers and vegetables as I can plant.

It is my experience that children are born to teach (remind) parents, not the other way around.   I’ve learned more from my daughter MacKenzie than from all other humans combined.

I’m in favor of wandering time in the morning, listening to the birds calling to each other in the woods all around me.

Making fresh food is one of life’s big yummy pleasures, along with singing – especially creating heavenly, improvisational, prayerful, meditational sound.

I believe that poet Mary Oliver writes the best bedtime stories available on Earth.

   

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Terri Crosby

Helping you create life-affirming, ever-evolving, happier relationships with those you love. Follow me on twitter at@TerriCrosby or read myblog.

Comments (0)

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    shiner

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    ” I mean what the heck! How in the world does hauling “I can’t” or “I didn’t” from the past improve the quality of life?”
    Amen Sister, and i laughed out loud when I read this.

    Reply

    • Avatar

      Terri Crosby

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      It’s so visual, isn’t it (hauling the past into one’s now) and I’m glad you laughed out loud! But then you’re easy that way, and that’s a VERY good thing! So glad to be your giggling buddy.

      Reply

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Rise Up by Andra Day

What a great set of words for these oncoming days.

Rise Up

 
You’re broken down and tired
Of living life on a merry go round
And you can’t find the fighter
But I see it in you so we gonna walk it out
And move mountains
We gonna walk it out
And move mountains
And I’ll rise up
I’ll rise like the day
I’ll rise up
I’ll rise unafraid
I’ll rise up
And I’ll do it a thousand times again
And I’ll rise up
High like the waves
I’ll rise up
In spite of the ache
I’ll rise up
And I’ll do it a thousand times again
For you
For you
For you
For you
When the silence isn’t quiet
And it feels like it’s getting hard to breathe
And I know you feel like dying
But I promise we’ll take the world to its feet
And move mountains
Bring it to its feet
And move mountains
And I’ll rise up
I’ll rise like the day
I’ll rise up
I’ll rise unafraid
I’ll rise up
And I’ll do it a thousand times again
For you
For you
For you
For you
All we need, all we need is hope
And for that we have each other
And for that we have each other
And we will rise
We will rise
We’ll rise, oh, oh
We’ll rise
I’ll rise up
Rise like the day
I’ll rise up
In spite of the ache
I will rise a thousand times again
And we’ll rise up
High like the waves
We’ll rise up
In spite of the ache
We’ll rise up
And we’ll do it a thousand times again
For you
For you
For you
For you
Ah, ah, ah, ah
Source: LyricFind
Songwriters: Cassandra Monique Batie / Jennifer Decilveo
Rise Up lyrics © BMG Rights Management

Terri’s book of photography combined with poetry is here! 100 Words: Small Servings of Whimsy and Wisdom to Calm the Mind and Nourish the Heart.

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Rippling Abs, Anyone?

Rippling Abs, Anyone?

During this strange time in history, I noticed y’all were tackling all sorts of interesting projects. I decided I needed one, too—something positive to remember the pandemic of 2020 by.
 
I decided to pay attention to something I had abandoned…
 
Nope, I’m not cleaning my garage. I am not organizing one single thing. I’m not planting a garden or cleaning up my yard.
 
Instead, I decided to take care of myself better. This, folks, has made all the difference for me.
 
With relatively little time and effort on my part, I feel so much better than I did a month ago.
 
On March 30, I got on the exercise bike and the yoga mat for the first time in a long time, and did 30 minutes each. I liked it so much that I decided to do it every day. But I fell short of that, and changed my commitment to every other day, which felt more manageable, reasonable, and doable.
 
I also get off the bike after every song, take a couple of sips of water, shake out my legs and arms for a few seconds, and get back on. This makes the bike project a reasonable proposition, too.
 
Daily walks of any length—by myself, or with my little guy, Jackson—are a fresh air bonus.
 
My recumbent exercise bike has pulleys to work my upper body while I pedal, which gets my heart rate up fast, and also helps my whole-body strength. It feels good to get up from writing, or doing a consulting session with a client, to do something physically challenging while listening to good music.
 
After only a month, I feel a sheet of muscles on the front of me I haven’t felt for a very, very long time. Goodness gracious. Who knew they were there. I’ll be posting rippling ab photos soon, I’m sure.
 
I have no idea what the scales have to say about my bike/yoga project—I don’t care. Paying attention to scales tends to send me sideways, and therefore, I’m ignoring them completely.
 
But—I LOVE the way I feel! Hang in there, everyone.
 

Terri’s book of photography combined with poetry is here! 100 Words: Small Servings of Whimsy and Wisdom to Calm the Mind and Nourish the Heart.

Read more

Check Out This Troublemaker in Relationships

Check Out This Troublemaker in Relationships

Sometimes we ask intimate partners to do for us what is actually ours to do.

We ask our partner to give us the reassurance, love or appreciation we feel is missing in ourselves, with the hope that they will give us what we’re asking for—and then we’ll feel better. They’ll take care of our problem.

But when they do give us what we’re asking for, it can never be enough, because we have insufficient context for what they’ve given. We haven’t build the inner foundation to receive it, hear it, welcome it, believe it. They try to help, but their love for us falls into our void, our black hole, our love bucket with no bottom.

As always, there’s hope. Check out the video below.

Terri Crosby. http://www.incareofrelationships.com/.

Image by Free-Photos from Pixabay

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Terri Crosby

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