Love The One You’re With

What moves your relationship, from average to brilliant_-25

What a good idea, don’t you think, to LOVE THE ONE YOU’RE WITH, whether we’re talking about loving you or someone else?  And since there’s a strong connection between how much you love and accept yourself and how happy you are in a relationship, you could say that everything really starts with loving you. 

I’m excited about my upcoming course for women starting in April, called LOVE THE ONE YOU’RE WITH.  This course is the cream layer of what I’ve learned in 40 years about relationships. Over 7 weeks, course participants will learn 6 pivotal changes that offer beneficial and immediately applicable shifts in perspective right where you want them, along with valuable and life-enhancing tools for improving your relationship.

april 10-12Benimussa Parkibiza, spain-14

If I had known even two of the six pivotal changes and put them into practice, it would have changed the direction of my life entirely.

If someone had told me when I was about 20 years old that I was working perfectly, that there was nothing wrong with me, and nothing to fix, I am sure I would have looked at them quite quizzically.   Maybe I would have asked for some evidence. 

And if I had asked for evidence, maybe they would have told me the proof that everything about me is working perfectly is that there is something I’m really good at.  (And everyone else in the world is good at this, as well.)

They would have sat me down and told me that I was really good at producing the results I produce.  I’m a master of my own outcomes.   The only question is, “Do I like those outcomes?  Am I producing the results I want?”

They might have told me that there’s a big secret the adults who raised us probably didn’t teach us, or operate from.   If they didn’t teach us, it simply means they forgot the secret themselves. They didn’t teach it to us because they couldn’t.  

Most parents didn’t tell us that we have within us a built-in, surefire way of determining what’s on track for us and what’s not. What’s right for us, what’s not so much. What brings out our talents and inner knowing, and what doesn’t.  What makes us shiny happy, bursting with enthusiasm, and ready to take on the world, vs. what makes us discouraged, reticent, or even mad-as-a-hornet-angry.

If they didn’t teach us, it’s because they forgot it themselves, even though I believe with all my heart that we come into this life knowing fully how to make decisions beneficial to who we are and where we’re headed. 

So the course will begin with remembering that everything about you is working perfectly.  We’ll talk about the evidence for that, and make sure this idea is our “solid ground.”  Then we’ll remember and revive our inner guidance system, which changes everything.  That’s for starters. 

After that, we’ll work with other questions over the seven weeks that we’re together.  Here are a few.

  • What is one of the most deeply powerful influences on male-female relationships that almost everyone ignores? How could this set of information work to your advantage if you knew what it was and how it works?
  • What are three personal philosophies that help create a consistently positive flow in your relationship and in your life?
  • Why does change feel so strange at first?   
  • What are five easy-to-remember steps to change?
  • What’s the connection between thought, feeling and outcome? How does knowing this help you change?
  • What moves your relationship from average to brilliant? What changes it from “going through the motions,” to more fun and satisfying?

 I hope you’ll join me in answering those questions, and in doing so, creating positive momentum in your relationship. There are only eight seats available in this first course, but there will be more. If you’d like to find out more about this unique course, or if you’d like to participate, click over now. 

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Terri Crosby

Helping you create life-affirming, ever-evolving, happier relationships with those you love. Follow me on twitter at@TerriCrosby or read myblog.

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Rise Up by Andra Day

What a great set of words for these oncoming days.

Rise Up

 
You’re broken down and tired
Of living life on a merry go round
And you can’t find the fighter
But I see it in you so we gonna walk it out
And move mountains
We gonna walk it out
And move mountains
And I’ll rise up
I’ll rise like the day
I’ll rise up
I’ll rise unafraid
I’ll rise up
And I’ll do it a thousand times again
And I’ll rise up
High like the waves
I’ll rise up
In spite of the ache
I’ll rise up
And I’ll do it a thousand times again
For you
For you
For you
For you
When the silence isn’t quiet
And it feels like it’s getting hard to breathe
And I know you feel like dying
But I promise we’ll take the world to its feet
And move mountains
Bring it to its feet
And move mountains
And I’ll rise up
I’ll rise like the day
I’ll rise up
I’ll rise unafraid
I’ll rise up
And I’ll do it a thousand times again
For you
For you
For you
For you
All we need, all we need is hope
And for that we have each other
And for that we have each other
And we will rise
We will rise
We’ll rise, oh, oh
We’ll rise
I’ll rise up
Rise like the day
I’ll rise up
In spite of the ache
I will rise a thousand times again
And we’ll rise up
High like the waves
We’ll rise up
In spite of the ache
We’ll rise up
And we’ll do it a thousand times again
For you
For you
For you
For you
Ah, ah, ah, ah
Source: LyricFind
Songwriters: Cassandra Monique Batie / Jennifer Decilveo
Rise Up lyrics © BMG Rights Management

Terri’s book of photography combined with poetry is here! 100 Words: Small Servings of Whimsy and Wisdom to Calm the Mind and Nourish the Heart.

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Rippling Abs, Anyone?

Rippling Abs, Anyone?

During this strange time in history, I noticed y’all were tackling all sorts of interesting projects. I decided I needed one, too—something positive to remember the pandemic of 2020 by.
 
I decided to pay attention to something I had abandoned…
 
Nope, I’m not cleaning my garage. I am not organizing one single thing. I’m not planting a garden or cleaning up my yard.
 
Instead, I decided to take care of myself better. This, folks, has made all the difference for me.
 
With relatively little time and effort on my part, I feel so much better than I did a month ago.
 
On March 30, I got on the exercise bike and the yoga mat for the first time in a long time, and did 30 minutes each. I liked it so much that I decided to do it every day. But I fell short of that, and changed my commitment to every other day, which felt more manageable, reasonable, and doable.
 
I also get off the bike after every song, take a couple of sips of water, shake out my legs and arms for a few seconds, and get back on. This makes the bike project a reasonable proposition, too.
 
Daily walks of any length—by myself, or with my little guy, Jackson—are a fresh air bonus.
 
My recumbent exercise bike has pulleys to work my upper body while I pedal, which gets my heart rate up fast, and also helps my whole-body strength. It feels good to get up from writing, or doing a consulting session with a client, to do something physically challenging while listening to good music.
 
After only a month, I feel a sheet of muscles on the front of me I haven’t felt for a very, very long time. Goodness gracious. Who knew they were there. I’ll be posting rippling ab photos soon, I’m sure.
 
I have no idea what the scales have to say about my bike/yoga project—I don’t care. Paying attention to scales tends to send me sideways, and therefore, I’m ignoring them completely.
 
But—I LOVE the way I feel! Hang in there, everyone.
 

Terri’s book of photography combined with poetry is here! 100 Words: Small Servings of Whimsy and Wisdom to Calm the Mind and Nourish the Heart.

Read more

Check Out This Troublemaker in Relationships

Check Out This Troublemaker in Relationships

Sometimes we ask intimate partners to do for us what is actually ours to do.

We ask our partner to give us the reassurance, love or appreciation we feel is missing in ourselves, with the hope that they will give us what we’re asking for—and then we’ll feel better. They’ll take care of our problem.

But when they do give us what we’re asking for, it can never be enough, because we have insufficient context for what they’ve given. We haven’t build the inner foundation to receive it, hear it, welcome it, believe it. They try to help, but their love for us falls into our void, our black hole, our love bucket with no bottom.

As always, there’s hope. Check out the video below.

Terri Crosby. http://www.incareofrelationships.com/.

Image by Free-Photos from Pixabay

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Terri Crosby

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