Got Your Underwear In A Bundle?

 

Written by Terri Crosby for In Care of Relationships

panties in a wadAre your panties in a wad about something? Knickers in a twist? Uncomfortable?  Things not going too well today?  Something threw you off the happy merry-go-round? Ahhhh, yes — happens to all of us. Yep, there are good days, and there are days we’d rather forget about.

WHAT WAS I THINKING?

I had an experience recently that taught me really good things by “throwing myself over the cliff” if you know what I mean.   Here’s the thing.  My suffering was self-induced.  It was unnecessary.  The thing that triggered it was unimportant.   The situation “snuck up” on me.  By the time I realized how bent out of shape I was, it was too late. The lesson began by watching a live-stream-webinar-thingy, and it went on for a while.  i tried to do other things (multi-task) and just have it running in the background until something I really wanted to hear came on. But I’m just curious enough about how other people conduct their business that I kept watching.  The interesting thing is that the longer I watched, the more uncomfortable I became. Except I didn’t really notice. Not really. I ignored my feelings, because there was a particular person I wanted to see — a guest on the show.  It took a couple hours for me to fall down and go boom.  I couldn’t believe it took so long. jumping offSo why not just stop watching?  Yep.  That would have been the logical solution.  Just stop already. But I didn’t do that, because there was that big carrot hanging out there that I was trying to get. It took waaaaaaaaaaay too long, and the longer it went on, the worse I felt. It’s like taking a bite of something and thinking, “Well, that doesn’t taste so great.”  So I take another bite, hoping it will get better somehow!  The first bite is disbelief.  “It just can’t be that bad.”  Or it’s curiosity —  “What’s wrong with that? — Really!  Why does that taste icky?”   And then I try to figure it out. Or I take that bite of salad, it’s not thrilling, but I figure (hope?) the main meal will be better.  Silly me.  If a restaurant can’t make a good first course or appetizer, well, then… you get the idea.  It’s called a clue. The good news?  There was at least one benefit of all of this.  The long-drawn-out-live-stream-webinar-marathon lesson clarified something important for me about my business — in particular, my style.  At the end of the whole mess I was crystal clear about what’s important to me about my relationship with my clients. I’m thankful that some lessons are pretty easy — no big drama, no crashing emotions,  just “yeah, that went sideways.”  And that’s it.  And other lessons (bless them!) cause me to get my undies in a bundle before I find the gold. This one was pretty big and had some punch.  My underwear got all in a bundle, but the worst part was how I didn’t notice it until it was way too late.  Funny how that works. But I know at least two things about having one’s underwear in a bundle:
  1. What’s the difference between a tragedy and a comedy?  A tragedy is when something not so great happens to you, and a comedy is when it happens to someone else.  Ha!  So I can pretend I’m the person observing, instead of the person to whom it’s happening.  I mean, why not!  I have a great imagination.  I can do that.  It works.  It makes it pass by with a smile.
  2. If it’s something I could possibly laugh about in 6 months (Or a few days or hours), cowgirl skateswhy not start now?  I can do that, too.  I can get over it enough to laugh.
And I’m here to tell ya (not too much later), I’m feeling entertained by what happened. Really, it’s all because I bought myself a pair of these. Now I skate through anything!  Woo Hoo!  

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For more information about In Care of Relationships, click here.

new shoots 2About Terri Crosby — I live in the Blue Ridge Mountains with Eric, my partner of 14 years, two cats and a dog, and as many flowers and vegetables as I can plant.

It is my experience that children are born to teach (remind) parents, not the other way around.   I’ve learned more from my daughter MacKenzie than from all other humans combined.

I’m in favor of wandering time in the morning, listening to the birds calling to each other in the woods all around me.

Making fresh food is one of life’s big yummy pleasures, along with singing – especially creating heavenly, improvisational, prayerful, meditational sound.

I believe that poet Mary Oliver writes the best bedtime stories available on Earth.

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Terri Crosby

Helping you create life-affirming, ever-evolving, happier relationships with those you love. Follow me on twitter at@TerriCrosby or read myblog.

Comments (0)

  • Avatar

    shiner

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    First off, I have used that expression, getting your oanties in a wad and what fun to read it here! The image of the boots and skating through those messes is grand.
    Thanks

    Reply

  • Avatar

    shiner

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    OPPS, that should be Panties in a wad…

    Reply

  • Avatar

    Keldwyn

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    I am curious about who the speaker you wanted to hear was and if it was worth the pantie bundling wad? and i love the lessons
    GREAT BOOTS!!! (where’d you get ’em?
    Love you Terri
    Keldwyn

    Reply

    • Avatar

      Terri Crosby

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      The speaker was someone in my field, and the pantie bundling was worth it, but not in the way that I expected. What I learned was not what I expected. (Once again!) Kind of a double whammy that day! These boots were made for skatin’… and that’s just what they’ll do… :–) Remember Nancy Sinatra????

      Reply

  • Avatar

    Lyte

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    When the “stuff” gets deep, it’s helpful to be wearing boots! Here’s to Orderly Underwear, and the wisdom to skate through life!

    Reply

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Rise Up by Andra Day

What a great set of words for these oncoming days.

Rise Up

 
You’re broken down and tired
Of living life on a merry go round
And you can’t find the fighter
But I see it in you so we gonna walk it out
And move mountains
We gonna walk it out
And move mountains
And I’ll rise up
I’ll rise like the day
I’ll rise up
I’ll rise unafraid
I’ll rise up
And I’ll do it a thousand times again
And I’ll rise up
High like the waves
I’ll rise up
In spite of the ache
I’ll rise up
And I’ll do it a thousand times again
For you
For you
For you
For you
When the silence isn’t quiet
And it feels like it’s getting hard to breathe
And I know you feel like dying
But I promise we’ll take the world to its feet
And move mountains
Bring it to its feet
And move mountains
And I’ll rise up
I’ll rise like the day
I’ll rise up
I’ll rise unafraid
I’ll rise up
And I’ll do it a thousand times again
For you
For you
For you
For you
All we need, all we need is hope
And for that we have each other
And for that we have each other
And we will rise
We will rise
We’ll rise, oh, oh
We’ll rise
I’ll rise up
Rise like the day
I’ll rise up
In spite of the ache
I will rise a thousand times again
And we’ll rise up
High like the waves
We’ll rise up
In spite of the ache
We’ll rise up
And we’ll do it a thousand times again
For you
For you
For you
For you
Ah, ah, ah, ah
Source: LyricFind
Songwriters: Cassandra Monique Batie / Jennifer Decilveo
Rise Up lyrics © BMG Rights Management

Terri’s book of photography combined with poetry is here! 100 Words: Small Servings of Whimsy and Wisdom to Calm the Mind and Nourish the Heart.

Read more

Rippling Abs, Anyone?

Rippling Abs, Anyone?

During this strange time in history, I noticed y’all were tackling all sorts of interesting projects. I decided I needed one, too—something positive to remember the pandemic of 2020 by.
 
I decided to pay attention to something I had abandoned…
 
Nope, I’m not cleaning my garage. I am not organizing one single thing. I’m not planting a garden or cleaning up my yard.
 
Instead, I decided to take care of myself better. This, folks, has made all the difference for me.
 
With relatively little time and effort on my part, I feel so much better than I did a month ago.
 
On March 30, I got on the exercise bike and the yoga mat for the first time in a long time, and did 30 minutes each. I liked it so much that I decided to do it every day. But I fell short of that, and changed my commitment to every other day, which felt more manageable, reasonable, and doable.
 
I also get off the bike after every song, take a couple of sips of water, shake out my legs and arms for a few seconds, and get back on. This makes the bike project a reasonable proposition, too.
 
Daily walks of any length—by myself, or with my little guy, Jackson—are a fresh air bonus.
 
My recumbent exercise bike has pulleys to work my upper body while I pedal, which gets my heart rate up fast, and also helps my whole-body strength. It feels good to get up from writing, or doing a consulting session with a client, to do something physically challenging while listening to good music.
 
After only a month, I feel a sheet of muscles on the front of me I haven’t felt for a very, very long time. Goodness gracious. Who knew they were there. I’ll be posting rippling ab photos soon, I’m sure.
 
I have no idea what the scales have to say about my bike/yoga project—I don’t care. Paying attention to scales tends to send me sideways, and therefore, I’m ignoring them completely.
 
But—I LOVE the way I feel! Hang in there, everyone.
 

Terri’s book of photography combined with poetry is here! 100 Words: Small Servings of Whimsy and Wisdom to Calm the Mind and Nourish the Heart.

Read more

Check Out This Troublemaker in Relationships

Check Out This Troublemaker in Relationships

Sometimes we ask intimate partners to do for us what is actually ours to do.

We ask our partner to give us the reassurance, love or appreciation we feel is missing in ourselves, with the hope that they will give us what we’re asking for—and then we’ll feel better. They’ll take care of our problem.

But when they do give us what we’re asking for, it can never be enough, because we have insufficient context for what they’ve given. We haven’t build the inner foundation to receive it, hear it, welcome it, believe it. They try to help, but their love for us falls into our void, our black hole, our love bucket with no bottom.

As always, there’s hope. Check out the video below.

Terri Crosby. http://www.incareofrelationships.com/.

Image by Free-Photos from Pixabay

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Terri Crosby

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